Most of you reading this will have no idea what I’m talking about. Let’s start here. Do you have a teenage daughter? Does she watch Vine videos? (Vine is a social media App that let’s you take 5 second videos). I do and she does. A few weeks ago, my daughter shoves her cell phone in my face and asks me to input my credit card information as fast as I can because we only have a few seconds to buy tickets, and I blindly did so. Apparently, we were buying MAGCON tickets and this was a huge coup because they sell out fast. What is MAGCON you ask? I’ll try and enlighten you.
Last Saturday, we arrived to the hotel downtown, to a line a mile long of 1,000 teenage girls (I would like to point out that the majority of them were NOT with their parents). I don’t know about you, but I’m not that mom. Let’s talk clothes. The girls were wearing short shorts with their cheeks hanging out, strappy sandals and half shirts with their bellies showing. Nice job moms? The security guard was screaming at us for no reason and I felt like a cow in the herd waiting to be zapped with a cattle prod. We waited for at least an hour. Why weren’t they letting us go in already?
I had absolutely no idea what I was in for. Was this a concert? Were these kids going to perform? It took me a good 6 hours to figure it all out, but I finally dialed in. I learned that MAGCON stands for Meet and Greet Conference. We walked into a gigantic ballroom with a tiny stage. On the stage was Mahogany the DJ who jammed tunes all night while thousands of girls danced their booties off having the time of their life. The first thing I did was walk to the back of the room and sit on the floor (carpeted), by one of the few other moms in the joint, and we became fast friends. The two of us kept waiting to see what was going to happen, and nothing ever did.
I finally saw a mom who looked like she knew something so I walked over to her and here is our conversation: Me, “Can you tell me what we are doing here”? Her, “Just go with it. I’m Jack and Jack’s mom”. Me, “You have two sons named Jack”? Her, “No, Jack and Jack have been best friends since they were in Kindergarten and they make funny Vine videos”. Me, “Oh, so your son is one of the kids that my daughter is here to see”? Her, “Yes. We’re from Omaha Nebraska and the boys videos went viral and now they have 3 million followers and they’re famous”. Me, “What exactly do they do”?
And then her entourage called her away. Apparently the “parents” of these Vine kids are just as famous as their sons and the girls want to take pictures with them too. How did this all happen you ask? A brilliant promoter realized that these charismatic teenage boys, had millions of young girls following them, and found an ingenious way to cash in on it. If you paid $170 dollars for a VIP ticket, your daughter could actually stand in a line for over an hour just to get a shirt signed or snap a picture with these boys. Oh, and every hour and a half, the boys got to take a break...from doing nothing!
I was starving because there was NO food, just a water cooler. By the end of the night, I was sitting on the floor, eating a bag of peanuts that I bought from the gift shop, questioning my sanity.
Mother of the Year award better have my name on it. Wait, there’s more good news. I just found out they’re coming back in November. If we’re lucky, (and keep hitting the refresh button on our cell phone), we can get our VIP tickets and see them do nothing, again.
How do you like that, famous for being cute? It’s a new world and us old folks are just living in it. What say you, email@example.com?